Who came up with the idea of Hewhocorrupts?
The corporation was founded by my father William Camaro the third
in the early 1900's when he recognized hardcore's bid for globalization.
Almost 100 years later we have become the leader in our industry
and like my father said back then "this life is like food,
it always turns to shit in the in" and you can take that
to the bank and cash it!
Have you guys ever had the problem of anyone
not understanding your sarcasm?
I'm not sure what you mean. I'm sensing some sarcasm in your question.
We run one of the finest businesses in this country. If you want
sarcasm go talk to one of those kids that ride their skateboards
outside our office everyday. This kids are little snot nose fucks.
I hope a bus gets drop on
their fucking heads...soon.
Where do most of the ideas of your songs
come from musically and lyrically?
Most of our songs are produced in the Hewhocorrupts Inc. Sound
Production Department lead by new hire Michael Adirelli. We were
lucking enough to pick up Michael last month after he had a falling
out with MCA Records. Michael has worked with some of our industries
top acts, including Andrew WK and The Hives. I almost get hives
just thinking about working with him and how our relationship
will generate a very prosperous future!
You guys put out a lot of splits do you
prefer to do a release that way?
It's definitely a marketing trick that I think really benefits
our band. We try to hit each genre of hardcore, reaching to each
of their audience in an exclusive manner that will maximize profits
for the current quarter. If we see that mosh core is in, we approach
mosh bands to do a split with us.
Currently we are looking into releasing a record with a old school
band. According to research that we have done in such magazines
as Maximum Rock n Roll, we feel that his will be the next big
money maker for the company.
Any plans for a full length?
Not really, I already have a full length...at least that secretary
we fired last month use to think so. I'm pretty happy with my
"full length". I think any discussions of an enlargment
will come after my 50th birthday...at least I hope.
What's the connection to the band Hewhocorrupts
and the label Hewhocorrupts?
There is no connection. They are the same enterprize. I'm beginning
to think that this interview was a waste of my god damn time.
Here's a suggestion, do some research before you interview your
next CEO...that is, if you ever interview a CEO again. Pssssssh.
Hewhocorrupts just played an over 21 show
was that weird for the band?
No, actually it was a great experience. You didn't have to deal
with those dumb 16 year olds and their fucking skateboards and
earrings and there was actually some people there that new a thing
or two about investing. We also decided to capitalize off the
crowd by bringing our personal bar to the show and lowering our
drink prices by twenty fives cents to beat out the competition.
Needless to say we made more money than a candy machine in a Jenny
Do you prefer shows in the city or suburbs?
Anything that is closer to the loop is better for my company and
I. I prefer to work as much as possible in order to make sure
anyone I lay eyes upon has less money than me and anything that
defers me from that, like wasting time driving to a soccer mom's
house to play a show in the suburbs, really pisses me off.
Hewhocorrupts would be labeled as a hardcore
band. Do you think there is too much division in the Chicago scene
within the genres of punk?
If you knew anything about marketing you would know that making
yourself stand out will only benefit your enterprise. I say create
this fucking division. In fact, now that I think about it, we
are in our own fucking division, the H to the W to the mother
fucking C Inc. division! And you can take that to the bank and
make a savings account out of it...you god damn shit!
Does Durkin hectic schedule hurt the band?
Does it help that he's only taking art classes this quarter?
I think you might have your questions mix up here for the other
company you said you were interviewing later. After having my
secretary check our current employee roster in the HWC Inc. database
we have confirmed their is no employee working here with the last
name Durkin. Again, I'm sorry, but I can't not answer this question.
How old is Mendola really? And is he the
father figure of the band?
After another check off the database, again we have come up with
the same results. Their is no an employee here named Mendola!
And again, this is not a band, it is a business! Ask me one more
fucking question like that again and your going to end up like
AT&T's stock right now...going down!
Do you think Hewhocorrupts would be here
today if it weren't for Dave Eves and the Elmhurst VFW?
think your funny kid, huh? I don't have time to waste talking
about people who I have no business concerns with! Hewhocorrupts
owes their existence to William Camaro and William Camaro. That
guy took a peice of shit, polished it, and made it into a fucking
diamond! You hear me! A fucking diamond I say! I have had enough
of your shit and I'm about to consilidate your ass like a bad
dad. You better reconcile your statements punk!
Who were the biggest influences on your
band ethically and musically?
Fuck you and fuck you!
Any last words to wrap this up?
Kiss my fucking ass you dip shit!
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